Friday, 19 July 2019

Is their head in the sand?

“How do I get their head out of the sand?”
It’s a question I get asked about colleagues, team members, partners, friends and family, and it’s asked in relation to situations they believe could be improved if only the other person would accept there was a problem, and take appropriate action to resolve it.

It’s also a question asked when they believe they know what the solution is.
There’s a fundamental flaw in this perspective - the person, like me in the photo above, has to take their own head out of the sand.

We might encourage them but, ultimately, the decision is theirs. Which means there’s only so much we can do.
In some respects it’s what 'Can’t see the Wood for the Trees' was written for - to help people a little resistant to hearing advice from others, just like myself, to get out of a rut, stop treading water or going round in circles and to see the wood for the trees and get back on track. (Hint it’s available from all online stockists.)
One word of warning, it’s certainly easier to notice that others have their head in the sand than ourselves - which means when we’re getting frustrated with others it might be a red flag of our own lack of awareness and need for action.

Tuesday, 16 July 2019

Beware the reflected bridges you’re building

Take care when building bridges with others - if halfheartedly undertaken, your bridge may be as useful as the reflection in this image and mean you just get into more deep water, not rise above it.

As you know, language and metaphor are good friends of mine, and are firm favourites in the LANDSCAPE coaching toolkit I use with procurement teams and personal clients. Which means if you’re struggling to build a bridge with someone I’m just as likely to explore the situation metaphorically using real bridge building as I am the real life situation.

One reason for this is that we’ve often got judgements about the other person, their contribution to the current situation, and even the amount of effort they need to put into resolving the situation. Which can ensure we spiral around blaming them and taking no action. A conversation about how we will build the bridge puts the ball firmly in our court, which is the quickest means of finding resolution.

After all, we could be a long time waiting for the other person to take the first move, and so much more water will have flowed under the bridge by then it may be irreversibly broken.
The key is building wholeheartedly because it’s our choice, and not halfheartedly because someone told us to.

Monday, 8 July 2019

I'm speechless...or I've become one of those authors

Wow - I’m still a little speechless (and you know me; that’s not often).

Here’s why.

20 years ago I can remember buying all the many books on the reading list for my trainer training. 

I remember looking up to those authors whose tools and techniques were making a difference in people’s lives. Admiring their creativity and authority in a subject that has the ability to transform lives.

At the time I introduced a coaching tool of my own and over the last 20 years have used it with many clients. I even wrote a book sharing the process so other coaches and trainers could use it in their work, and to provide a resource for people to dip into and read a few pages when they were struggling - a little TLC and support when they needed it.

Since its publication nearly a year ago, I’ve heard stories of people’s lives being positively impacted by the book.

Recently I heard that my book has been added to one trainer's reading list, and used as a source for some of the training content.

I have become one of those authors I admired and that has given me goosebumps.

When did you last reflect on the journey you’ve been on and the achievements realised that once upon a time were only a dream?