Tuesday, 16 July 2019

Beware the reflected bridges you’re building



Take care when building bridges with others - if halfheartedly undertaken, your bridge may be as useful as the reflection in this image and mean you just get into more deep water, not rise above it.

As you know, language and metaphor are good friends of mine, and are firm favourites in the LANDSCAPE coaching toolkit I use with procurement teams and personal clients. Which means if you’re struggling to build a bridge with someone I’m just as likely to explore the situation metaphorically using real bridge building as I am the real life situation.

One reason for this is that we’ve often got judgements about the other person, their contribution to the current situation, and even the amount of effort they need to put into resolving the situation. Which can ensure we spiral around blaming them and taking no action. A conversation about how we will build the bridge puts the ball firmly in our court, which is the quickest means of finding resolution.

After all, we could be a long time waiting for the other person to take the first move, and so much more water will have flowed under the bridge by then it may be irreversibly broken.
The key is building wholeheartedly because it’s our choice, and not halfheartedly because someone told us to.

Monday, 8 July 2019

I'm speechless...or I've become one of those authors


Wow - I’m still a little speechless (and you know me; that’s not often).

Here’s why.

20 years ago I can remember buying all the many books on the reading list for my trainer training. 

I remember looking up to those authors whose tools and techniques were making a difference in people’s lives. Admiring their creativity and authority in a subject that has the ability to transform lives.

At the time I introduced a coaching tool of my own and over the last 20 years have used it with many clients. I even wrote a book sharing the process so other coaches and trainers could use it in their work, and to provide a resource for people to dip into and read a few pages when they were struggling - a little TLC and support when they needed it.

Since its publication nearly a year ago, I’ve heard stories of people’s lives being positively impacted by the book.



Recently I heard that my book has been added to one trainer's reading list, and used as a source for some of the training content.

I have become one of those authors I admired and that has given me goosebumps.

When did you last reflect on the journey you’ve been on and the achievements realised that once upon a time were only a dream?

Tuesday, 25 June 2019

I laughed so loudly!

I laughed so loudly last week - you know the sort of laugh that emerges from realising something very obvious?!

I knew my book, 'Can’t see the wood for the trees', was written for people who are stuck to support them to get back on track.

I knew the book helped people when stressed to access a more resourceful mindset - exams being one such area I know it’s helped a lot recently.

I hadn’t appreciated until then, of course, also helps people who are facing what I was when I wrote the book - menopause!

The BBC breakfast programme featured the menopause last month, and it was said that it can be a very creative time for women.

Then it hit me - that’s when the book finally got written.

Then I laughed, very loudly and only as you know I can, because I wonder - did this version of the book I’d been wanting to write for years get written because I needed the advice. Did the chapters emerge out of that need?

At that time I could certainly resonate with:
  • Can’t see the wood for the trees
  • Stuck in a rut
  • Going round in circles
  • Up the creek without a paddle
  • Out on a limb
  • Missed the tide
  • Treading water
  • Like a fish out of water
We live and learn, and I will think very carefully about the subject for the next book.